ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY did a big article on AMERICAN IDOL this week. Included was a section on “where are they now” featuring past contestants. I will now be the first to tell you where the current crop of contestants will be in a few years from now.
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CHRIS DAUGHTRY – Will win AMERICAN IDOL. Have a nice career but not great career because true rock fans will know he sold out by doing AI. The “Broadway” theme week won’t help either.
KELLIE PICKLER – Will have a modest career as a C/W singer. Her father will get out of jail and want to manage her. She will refuse. Her father will then kill the manager. There will be a movie of the week. Carrie Underwood will play Kellie.
PARIS BENNETT – Will play Gary Coleman in the touring company of AVENUE Q.
KATHERINE MCPHEE – Will join the Johnny Mann Singers and be heard on KRTH jingles. Will try to make a niche for herself in the standards market. Will discover there is no standards market. Will marry, have kids, and be forever bitter that Linda Eder has her career.
ACE YOUNG – Will star in a sitcom on the DISNEY CHANNEL. Will marry three times, have six kids, and be forever bitter that Scott Baio has his career.
ELLIOTT YAMIN – Will become a cantor. To mothers of the congregation with eligible daughters he will be viewed as George Clooney.
TAYLOR HICKS – Will become the President of the United States.
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