Diane Farr is hot for Peter McNichol???

First off, thanks to everyone who contributed their votes for worst song over the weekend. They were deliciously frightening and more suggestions are welcome. And if I may just add one of my own – Dang Me by Roger Miller (Roses are red and violets are purple, sugar’s sweet and so is maple surple.) Now for today’s rant.

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I think it started in the early 70’s. Even though Mary Richards only had an entry level job at WJM she still had this amazing wardrobe and never wore the same designer outfit twice. How did she pull that off on her paltry salary? Rhoda made more money and wore the same two schmatahs.

It’s called creative license and TV has gone to that card liberally and frequently ever since. Not that I’m not guilty of it myself. Audiences are supposed to believe that all eleven years of MASH actually took place over a one year time span. It was an especially hard buy during the many Christmas episodes. (There was also an episode that took place over one year but that wasn’t on our watch.)

Here are some more recent examples:

The Las Vegas CSI department must have a budget of $37 billion. They have every piece of equipment imaginable (even high tech contraptions that haven’t been invented yet). You need to determine what brand of gum was found on a shoe at the murder scene? They have a machine that can tell you the brand, flavor, and how many bubbles were blown. I bet if you saw the real Vegas CSI department it would look like your Uncle Bob’s garage. And the detectives would have to spring for their own goggles.

On NUMB3RS the math geek can do the most elaborate math problems in half a day and not the six months it would really take a computer to solve. Recently he charted the path of every student in a high school and was able to determine which class they were to attend if they hadn’t been gunned down. Amazing! Then, when he briefs the FBI he has found the time to create a whole animated computer graphic presentation. And even all that I could let slide. But now they have hot FBI agent, Diane Farr seemingly attracted to uber nerd Peter McNichol. Come on math whizzes, the probability of that can not even be calculated.

The O.C. – everything about it.

PRISON BREAK – Michael hasn’t been violated by every prison mate and six of the guards. Not believable.

HOUSE – Has a patient ever been to that hospital without going into seizures? Has a patient ever been correctly diagnosed without having to take four expensive tests that proved to be unnecessary? Blue Cross must go into conniptions when they get a bill from that hospital. Malpractice lawyers should set up card tables in the lobby.

LOST – One of the friends or relatives of the survivors couldn’t Google Map that island? Mark Burnett hasn’t scouted it yet for SURVIVOR?

24 – the granddaddy of them all. See several previous posts. I’ll just add that Jack’s cellphone always gets great reception, and how bad are our country’s intelligence agencies when the bad guys all have armies and compounds and guards aplenty yet no one in Homeland Security has any inkling of these world domination plots? And how do the bad guys recruit all these guards and soldiers? Do they put ads in LA WEEKLY? “Help Wanted: Guards for plot to take over America. Must have experience in firearms and be discreet. Contact: Mr. X, 187 E. Secret Compound Dr., Simi Valley, Ca. 91537.”

And finally, the topper -- WEST WING depicts the President of the United States as an intelligent learned compassion man. Everyone knows that couldn’t be further from what really exists in real life.