How can...?

How can there possibly be a Michael Eisner talk show?

How can the GEORGE LOPEZ SHOW reach 100 episodes?

How can American Airlines charge $4.00 for crackers?

How can El Coyote on Beverly Blvd. stay in business?

How can Rob Schneider keep making a living as an actor?

How can Paula Abdul even remember her name?

How can MAMA MIA still be running on Broadway?

How can George Mason be in the Final Four (not that I’m complaining)?

How can Jessica Simpson want to adopt a child?

How can Jack Bauer’s cellphone always get great reception?

How can Joan Rivers close her eyelids?

How can Neil Sedaka not be in the Rock ‘n Roll Hall of Fame?

How can anybody put together a piece of Ikea furniture?

How can Bonnie Bernstein think it’s better to host the Sprint NCAA tournament over-the-phone than sideline reporter for the CBS television network?

How can Barbara Walters be on INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO?

How can the JACK format still be on the air in New York?

How can ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY think Gene Wilder’s performance in YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN was the 9th greatest acting performance of ALL TIME??

How can Bucky still be on AMERICAN IDOL?

How can oil companies get away with charging almost $3.00 a gallon?

How can baseball commissioner Bud Selig hire a man who is part owner of the Red Sox and involved with ESPN to handle the “impartial” investigation of steroids?

How can the star of TRUE LIES be the governor of California?

And the biggest question of all:

How can George W. Bush actually be the President of the United States?